A beautiful young blonde was downtown, waiting for a bus, late on a Sunday afternoon.  She hadn't brought a book or a newspaper or anything to keep her busy, but she noticed a weight machine in front of a five and dime, the kind that tells your weight and your fortune. She thought she'd give it a try.
She stepped on the scale, put a penny in, and out came a little card:
"You are 5'2", you weigh 105 pounds, you have blond hair, blue eyes, and in a minute, you're going to fart."
She stepped off the machine, shaking her head, thinking, 'That is the most ridiculous "fortune" I ever heard." and as she stepped off, she farted!
"Oh my God", she said out loud! THat's astonishing - I didn't even feel like I had to fart! I've gotta try that again."
She got back on the scale again, and put a penny in again; out came the card: "You are 5'2", you weigh 105 pounds, you have blond hair, blue eyes, and in a minute, you're going to have sex."
"Have SEX?" she snorted, "hell, I'm here all alone, not a soul around, and I'm not in the mood anyway!!"
Just then,  a big brawny arm reaches from behind her, drags her into the nearest storefront and forces her to have sex with him.
She comes staggering out of the store, disheveled and disoriented.
"Jesus, that damn weight machine is AMAZING. I'm going to have to try that one more time before that bus gets here."  She steps up on the scale one more time and out comes another card:





"You are 5'2", you weigh 105 pounds, you have blond hair, blue eyes, and after all your farting and screwing around, you've missed your bus."